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Actor Wentworth Miller, who recently came out in a protest letter regarding Russia’s anti-gay laws, has revealed he attempted suicide as a teenager due to the mental toll hiding his sexuality caused.

Miller, speaking at a Human Rights Campaign dinner in Seattle on Saturday, opened up for the first time about the emotional pressure and pain he felt while growing up and realizing he was gay. Miller told during his speech how he had attempted suicide a number of times, the first time when he was 15.


Said Miller:

Growing up I was a target. Speaking the right way, standing the right way, holding your wrist the right way. Every day was a test and there were a thousand ways to fail. A thousand ways to betray yourself, to not live up to someone else’s standards of what was acceptable. Of what was normal. And when you failed the test, which was guaranteed, there was a price to pay. Emotionally. Psychologically. Physically.


The first time I tried to kill myself I was fifteen. I waited until my family went away for the weekend and I was alone in the house, and I swallowed a bottle of pills. I don’t remember what happened over the next couple of days but I’m pretty sure that come Monday morning I was on the bus back to school, pretending everything was fine.

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